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Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs
Prompt: // (M7 parte 2)
Parole: 6928
Rating: verde
Pairing: Oda/Dazai (implicito e onesided)
Warnings: small mafia stuff.
Two of his subordinates enter turn at the corner and only then Dazai moves and sneaks off until he reaches the door. Once he is finally outside, he makes sure nobody saw him or is following him and keeps walking.
He left his phone inside his room, on the small table next to his bed, in order to not be bothered by anyone; he has no intention to talk to people, for today, not if he can avoid it. Mori-san too, if he has a new mission for him, he will have to wait or to send someone to look for him and pick him up.
The alleys around the Port Mafia base are so familiar that Dazai barely looks at where he is going, turning to the left or to the right when needed, the path towards his destination clear in his mind. For once, he doesn’t want to be interrupted by incompetent subordinates nor by Mori-san.
The moment he takes a shortcut, he bumps into someone else and when he lowers his gaze he notices a small girl. It’s curious how a child about four or five years old is alone in such a place - at the same time, well, Dazai can’t really say this is the first time he sees an abandoned boy or girl alone in the streets. A lot of people in the Port Mafia were like her, after all.
She looks at him, curious but sceptical, unable to choose if she wants to get close or not; Dazai doesn’t move much, since he’s not really interested, but just when he is about to keep walking a small detail catches his attention. The young girl is now looking on the side, as if she noticed something in particular. What can be so interesting for a kid in a street like that? Dazai follows her gaze with his own, almost sure to find a stray cat or dog, but then there is nothing but a simple wall. He frowns and checks on the girl once again, then goes back to the wall because she is really looking at it, not casually studying her surroundings.
In the end, Dazai is about to let it go when she speaks for the first time since they saw each other: «Aren’t you curious?» she asks, as if they both know what she’s talking about. Dazai frowns, because that’s starting to sound suspicious but before he can actually say something or step back just to be prudent, the view of the street is suddenly blurry and he feels like his consciousness is leaving him. The girl calls for him, maybe. Dazai doesn’t know.
*
He hears confusing sounds around him and it takes him a few seconds to realise they are voices and more than that to get what they are talking about.
«His body is perfectly fine» it’s what a woman is saying, without touching him; probably she examined him while he was sleeping «and judging from what Atsushi-kun told us, it’s probably the effect of that ability user. If this is only about the physical change or something different, I won’t know it until he wakes up.» she adds, pragmatic and clear. Dazai doesn’t know who this is, but it would be easy to work with her. Unfortunately, she could be related to the girl in the street, despite her words.
Dazai tries to slightly move his arms and doesn’t feel anything like a restriction; what kind of idiot takes a mafioso with them and doesn’t even tied him up?
«Yosano-san» a different voice speaks, a worried shade easy to notice «is Dazai-san going to be alright? I mean, if it’s more than just a physical change...»
«I don’t think you need to worry, Atsushi-kun. You managed to bring him here the moment this whole mess happened. We have to wait to talk to him, but it’s not like Dazai ever died easily whenever he tried to.» she comforts him, a small chuckle that is probably half to reassure the “Atsushi” guy and half for his own amusement.
«Call me when he wakes up.» she says and Dazai can hear a few steps and the sound of the door opening and then closing; immediately after, something like a chair being moved suggests him that Atsushi must have taken a seat not too far from him. Dazai opens the only eye that is not covered by the bandages and sneaks a peek on his right: the Atsushi guy is there, as expected, and since he’s looking at him he notices almost immediately Dazai waking up. The surprised expression makes him look quite stupid, if Dazai can say this, but the moment he gets that Atsushi is going to call for the woman who just left, Dazai moves quickly and accordingly; he stops him before Atsushi can even stand up, going behind him and immobilizing him, an arm under his chin, a slight pressure against Atsushi’s neck.
Atsushi stays still, but Dazai can feel his body freeze: «Dazai-san…?»
«Who are you.» Dazai has no time to play games with the boy, he just needs to know why he’s there, what happened and for what reason Atsushi seems to be so shocked by his behaviour. After all, if he calls him like that without a proper introduction, he must have done his research. Being so close to each other, Dazai can easily notice the tension in Atsushi’s body but, being used to a certain environment and everything related - plus, having Nakahara Chuuya as his partner, unfortunately - he also feels that the tension is not the kind of one scared people have, but the one physically strong people try to suppress. It’s the pure, basic instinct that drives people in fights and animals in nature, the one they follow to survive. It’s like Atsushi could free himself hitting Dazai, yet he’s trying his best to not do it.
«I’m Nakajima Atsushi.» he finally introduces himself, but apart for his surname it’s not like this gives Dazai many informations.
«Where is this?»
«Dazai-san, do you really not remember-»
Dazai tightens his hold on him and feels Atsushi instinctively putting his hands on the arm against his neck, trying to move it away a little; he also seems to get that it’s not the time for asking questions, only to answer them.
«Where is this?»
«This is the Armed Detective Agency.»
«What is it?»
«...»
«Nakajima-kun, maybe you don’t really understand the situation.» Dazai almost makes fun of him because, really, how can someone in an “armed” organization be so silly to not get that Dazai wouldn’t hesitate to kill in that position, if needed?
Yet, inexplicably, Atsushi’s body feels less tense than before, as if he finally managed to calm down and analyse the situation rationally, but also as if he noticed he has some chances - which, to be honest, Dazai doesn’t think he has. When Atsushi speaks again, though, his choice of words is curious.
«Do you really not know what the Armed Detective Agency is, Dazai-san?»
It’s not the question per se, that itself is a bit dumb, because of course if he knew it, Dazai wouldn’t have asked; what surprises him a bit is that Atsushi feels betrayed, like this whole situation is unimaginable, an awful joke that went too far. It sounds as if Dazai is someone important that just hurt him, and how is that possible if Dazai doesn’t know a single thing about that boy?
Then, suddenly, Dazai notices Atsushi’s body relax completely.
«That» Atsushi says «you should ask it to Kunikida-san.»
*
In the end, Dazai let Atsushi go. After all not only he felt that Atsushi wasn’t in the right mood to speak - and, Dazai has to admit, not even scared enough to answer… such a masochistic boy - but somehow he had the impression that this Kunikida guy would know more. So he let go of Atsushi, not worried about him leaving the room to call for the woman who sounded like a doctor or for someone else. They didn’t really seem dangerous, leaving him untied and all, so Dazai didn’t worry at all.
The woman doctor enters first, a serious yet calm expression on her face. She is a person who is, for sure, considered a beauty but at the same time she gives off the feeling of someone who never really bothers about such trivial, idiotic things. He can appreciate this trait, at least it must be a good thing to have a colleague like this: no useless words nor fake compliments just to greet each other. Business and nothing else.
She looks at him, studies him; Dazai supposes she is trying to make sure he has no wounds, under those bandages and maybe she will ask him to make her check under them. Instead, she simply sits on a small stool close to the bed and stays quiet.
«Aren’t you going to check my wounds, doctor?» he hums, a fake smile on his lips. She smiles back, but it’s not a happy or comforting smile. More like, she’s challenging him: «I would, if you needed it, but you don’t. Also, believe me, you are to young for this. You don’t really want me to have to heal your wounds.» she assures, crossing her legs and waiting. For what, Dazai doesn’t know until the door opens again and a man enters, blonde hair and strict aura; he obviously isn’t going to take a seat, but he and the doctor share a brief look.
«You must be Kunikida.» Dazai says, no intentions of beating around the bush. The man is not surprised, that much is obvious; supposedly, Atsushi told him something about their conversation.
«The kid said you don’t know where you are.»
«Should I? Atsushi seemed shocked by me asking what the “Armed Detective Agency” is.»
Kunikida stays quiet for a few seconds, fixes his glasses on the nose in a gesture of what? Nervousness? Anxiety? No, Dazai thinks, this is what people with secrets they can’t tell do.
«How old are you?» Kunikida asks. Seriously? Of all the things he could - and, let’s be honest, should - ask him, it’s his age he’s concerned about? Nothing about the bandages? The mafioso clothes? The aura of a person who just can’t? No. His age.
Wow. Such detectives.
«Seventeen.» he says, bored and disappointed and irritated at the same time. If they are not going to keep him there as a hostage or a prisoner or whatever their idea is, he wants to leave. He lost interest already - until he notices that now even this Kunikida guy looks shocked.
«Would you stop with that look? All of you keep asking weird stuff and then you have this idiotic look on your face, like I just told you that the Earth will explode in ten hours and you can’t do anything to avoid it or save yourselves.» Dazai accuses them, waiting for a reaction. Maybe the most surprising aspect is him being so involved by something said and done by people he doesn’t know nor care for. People that are not Odasaku, basically.
Kunikida and the doctor share another look and Dazai is already taking the first step to reach the door and leave, when Kunikida moves an arm to symbolically - and physically, if Dazai hadn’t immediately done it by himself - stop him.
«The Armed Detective Agency» Kunikida starts explaining «is an organization that...» he stops, his free hand goes to massage his temple. Dazai doesn’t know what’s so hard to tell to the point that such a strict, serious man seems so bothered. Dazai has to admit that, if they were both in the Port Mafia, it would be hilarious to make fun of him.
«What Kunikida is trying to say» the doctor’s voice is unexpected «is that the only Dazai we know is a twenty-two years old man who just recently disappeared in front of the boy who was here before during a mission. You are a singularity or irregularity. Not even I can choose between the two, but what’s sure is that you shouldn’t be here.»
As Dazai already thought: straight as an arrow, sharp as a sword. And yet, this doesn’t make sense at all and maybe she, somehow, gets that he’s not convinced in the least.
«Basically, we think you are in the wrong timeline, but we don’t know how it is possible.»
*
This is the most confusing situation he has ever been in.
After that doctor’s revelation - Yosano Akiko, she introduced herself after that - Dazai really didn’t know what to think. Usually he doesn’t just believe whoever tells him something; it would one thing if Odasaku were there to explain the same thing to him, but he is not. And that is when Dazai realised that if he really is in the future and this Armed Detective Agency is still in the same city, he only needs to go back to the Port Mafia and meet Odasaku and hear him out. If it was about another person, Dazai would think about the chance of them not being friends anymore, or enemies instead - he bets Chuuya still wants him dead but well, there’s not much difference from his timeline - and of every possible deceit but it’s Odasaku, who trusts people once he is their friend, because he honors that friendship. Odasaku, despite being older than him, takes him seriously and never once Dazai felt like the other man was underestimating him or (instead) justify him and his way of doing things.
If he could speak to Odasaku…
Kunikida is still seated behind his desk. Dazai didn’t expect such a - normal? Boring? - sight once outside of the infirmary and taken to the main office. Apparently not all the members are there, which could be a fortunate event because Dazai has no will and no patience to deal with a lot of people sure about him being some sort of weird presence there. For now, Kunikida and Atsushi are there, Yosano left a few minutes ago, a crazy Edogawa something guy went inside, spoke loudly, pointed his finger at him, laughed, asked Kunikida if that was for real, then acted totally uninterested, took his candies from another desk and disappeared behind another door.
Even Kunikida, who Dazai is supposed should be used to that, seemed very tired.
«Why am I still waiting here?» he asks for the umpteenth time. Not that he couldn’t run away, in normal circumstances, but as they moved from the infirmary to that office Kunikida said “the President is the only one who can really answer to your questions” and despite the high chance that this is only a lie to gain some time, there is also a tiny chance that what he said is the truth.
«Because the President hasn’t come back yet.» Kunikida answers without even looking up from the screen of his laptop, as if he’s quite used to deal with annoying people trying to interrupt his work.
Well, he barely blinked an eye when the Edogawa hurricane came, so maybe he simply is used to it.
He is almost hypnotized by Kunikida working, since this is the most entertaining thing in the room at the moment, that he doesn’t notice Atsushi until the guy puts a cup of something under his nose; when Dazai studies the drink, a delicious scent of chocolate hits him. Did Atsushi just offered him hot chocolate? Like, seriously?
«...»
«It’s starting to get chilly.» he justifies himself, a clumsy yet undeniably kind smile on his lips «Ah, I didn’t poison this or anything!» he adds quickly, like there is a real chance that someone like this could poison anyone. By mistake, maybe. Dazai is not a big fan of chocolate, but well; he takes the cup, eyes lingering on Atsushi.
«I don’t think you can manage to poison someone, Atsushi-kun. Also, I tried it already and I don’t like it as a suicide option.»
At this point, they usually have this awkward feeling about someone considered way to young to mention suicide; Atsushi, though, does not look surprised at all. Not happy, of course - it would be a bit too weird - but not so shocked. Instead, there is somehow a sort of nostalgic feeling that shows through his expression.
«So you used to say it when you were younger too...» it escapes his lips, obviously something he didn’t want to say out loud.
For the first time since he opened his eyes, someone’s words struck him. Dazai has always been pretty proud of how good he is at reading people “despite his young age” as often told him; he can not only get their character before they even show it themselves, but he can anticipate most of their plans and that’s why he is the youngest Executive in the Port Mafia ever since. So he knows, just by looking at him, that Atsushi’s sentence and his expression reveal an obvious admiration, affection, attachment. How the hell did he manage, in five years, to have a kid who looks up to him like this? Apart from the obvious lack of judgement skills Atsushi proves to have by doing it, there is complete trust towards Dazai.
He’s about to ask, considering there is not much to keep him busy at the moment, when the main door of the office opens and the first man that enters must be the President and not only because that’s how Kunikida greets him as he stands from his chair; Dazai, though, can’t help but focus on the second man that is the last person he thought he would have met there and now.
«Ango?»
Sakaguchi Ango is in front of him, some years older but not so different. He’s the first familiar face Dazai manages to look at since he woke up and despite him not being a sentimental person, he has to admit that it’s a good thing. Ango has the same, almost inscrutable expression but Dazai knows better and can see, even if barely, that Ango is surprised of seeing him like this. Fortunately enough, Dazai doesn’t see some kind of rejection in him, which means that he must still be his friend.
«He was downstairs when I arrived.» the President says, his eyes searching for Dazai and looking at him when he finds him; he is studying him but, more than anything, Dazai notices how the man doesn’t try to hide what he is doing. He doesn’t pretend to be polite enough to leave him some privacy, but he analyses him thoroughly; if this mess wasn’t, well, a mess but a friendlier situation, Dazai would ask him about it and curious to know what a man like this can see in him and, above all, if he is able to see through him. Unfortunately, this is a luxury Dazai doesn’t have right now.
Also, he really has no time to spare when this Agency guys keep trying to surprise him; Atsushi, specifically, moves some steps towards Ango and bows his head a little, as the polite kid Dazai is quite sure he really is, at this point.
«It was a good idea to call Sakaguchi-kun.» the President tells him, giving away the information about who Dazai should thank for Ango’s presence yet will not. The silence fills the room, quite uncomfortably, like they all have nothing to tell to the others. It’s not totally wrong, and the only two who should have a lot to share are not in the position to do it there, in front of everyone else; at least, Dazai doesn’t want to reveal more than necessary only to convince Ango to help him, especially because he needs to make sure that this Ango is an ally. Yet, something bothers Dazai. Ango has the troubled expression of someone that wants to talk but can’t, and Dazai’s guess could obviously be wrong but there is a high chance that the problem lies in one of the people in the office. If anything, Dazai could keep Atsushi out of this, but both Kunikida and the President might be the problem.
Until the President offers them to talk privately in his personal office. At this point Dazai doesn’t really know if he should laugh or scream in this situation.
*
No matter how absurd this can sound, the Armed Detective Agency guys really left him and Ango alone in the room; the President personally let them enter first and closed the door without joining them. He simply told them that, if they needed him, they could ask to Kunikida: «I will be in the office anyway.» he said and left, like that. No questions, no forcing them to let him stay, no guards. Dazai can't believe this, no matter how different this organization is from the Port Mafia, he got somehow that they are not a simple "detective agency" that accepts complex cases that the police can't manage. And it's not only about the "Armed" in the name, he felt that all the people part of it - at least those he met - must be special; and by "special" Dazai doesn't mean anything other than "ability users".
Ango sat first, Dazai followed, but neither of them chose to use the seat behind the desk that belongs to the President; Dazai is still convinced that the man is someone he should recognise, but at the same time something is sliping away from his grasp, as if he was trying to catch the air. Maybe he heard about him from someone? Maybe he will as soon as he comes back, maybe this Agency is not so far in the future for him too?
«Dazai-kun?»
Ango's voice catches his attention and Dazai snaps out of it, his gaze now on the other man. Ango doesn't look as nervous as before, but he doesn't look completely at ease either so Dazai supposes the thing he has to tell him is not easy to say, being it there while they are alone or in the middle of a crowded street.
«I didn't know you were affiliated with a detective agency.» he jokes, crossing his legs and drumming his fingers on the desk.
«I am not.» Ango replies, quite relaxed about this matter, so Dazai can hypotise that this is not the real problem «But even if I was, you wouldn't know anyway.» he adds and, despite the soft voice, this is a bit harsh in his own way. Dazai gets what he is saying in that roundabout way that he is not sure if it's typical of Ango or not, and that is the whole point: he wouldn't know because this is not his timeline, this is not the Ango he meets at bar Lupin, this is not the organization where he knows exactly who he can trust and who he can't.
«Eh. Isn't it quite a cold thing to say, Ango-kun.» he replies, a bit of (fake) pout on his lips, pretending to be deeply offended and hurt. Ango stares at him, uncomfortable. Has their relationship changed so much, in five years?
«Isn't it true, though?» he replies as if it's nothing «When Nakajima-kun called me, I thought this was some sort of joke. What happened?»
«I saw a little girl.» Dazai answers and he knows it sounds absurd but that's the truth; strangely enough, all considered, Ango seems to believe him.
«An orphan?»
«Probably someone that lives in the street. She didn't look like a lost child and her clothes were not exactly first class.» he describes as much as he can, because if a she is around five or six years old in his timeline, she should be ten or eleven right now, so maybe she is still around or maybe she entered some kind of orphanage.
«I will search for the childcare programs around the area. In the meantime, I think you shouldn't go out if not strictly necessary.»
«Why can't I go back to the Port Mafia, instead of staying here?»
It could sound as a childish question, like a son asking why he can't play with his favourite toy; but both Dazai and Ango, as they look at each other, know that this is only Dazai pretending to ask casually. Ango sighs, his hand reaching for his glasses, taking them off for a few moments.
«For the same reasons why the Detective Agency members know who you are.» he explains, putting his glasses back on his nose «You should forget all your allies, Dazai, and you should not search for any of them. Anything you get to know here will greatly influence your timeline and every slight change you will do once you will go back will be a great disaster here.»
Dazai gets what he means. This is clearly an ability about some kind of time travel, and of course this is not something one should underestimate. Yet that weird feeling Dazai got from Ango still lingers there, between them, making Ango look like a culprit that wants to run away before the police gets him.
«Would it be so bad to change the things you wanted to be different?»
It's a provocative question, Dazai is sure Ango knows it; because, after all, Dazai has never truly appreciated his life but he never knew what he would have changed if he had had the chance to do it. If his ability wasn't the power to nullify the others, but the power to change the past or the future, he would hate it. The only people able to completely understand an ability like that must be those with strong desires and an unbelievable will to life, not just survive and even less the wish to die. Maybe someone like Mori-san could make use of this plently - but honestly, it would be terrifying in his hands - or maybe that kid Dazai met, with who know how many dreams despite her living like that, probably alone.
Ango should know he has nothing he really wants to change, yet his expression is different now, strict and... regretful. About what, Dazai doesn't know and should not ask; he is sure Ango wouldn't tell him anyway.
«It wouldn't.» Ango replies in the end, closing the distance between where they sat and the door step by step. Once he reaches it he raises his hand to open it, but seems to change his mind just before doing it. Still, he doesn't look at Dazai when he speaks.
«No matter how many regrets one has, in the end changing the past would only make things worst.»
Dazai can't help but chuckle, especially if the thinks about going back to his timeline and tell "his" Ango that in a few years he will become even more serious and pessimistic. He can't really help but make fun of him a bit more - it's not that he can't read the atmosphere, but despite Ango being one of his (very) few friends, Dazai is not such a sensitive person. Not even with those close to him.
«Isn't the whole "going back and change things" supposed to make them better?»
«Of course. But at what cost?» Ango says, almost a whisper, as if not sure about wanting to be heard or not. He finally opens the door, exits and just before closing he stops once again and turns to look at him.
For the first time, Dazai can't guess Ango's thoughts and can't decipher his expression. It's annoying.
«You don't want to know the price, Dazai-kun. Believe me.»
Dazai doesn't have the time to ask him "what if I'm not afraid of lose something, but I also don't have anything to offer?".
That question never had an answer anyway.
*
Ango went away almost immediately after their talk. He didn't say much to the President or to Kunikida, he didn't even metioned their small exchange about future and past and tragedies. Ango assured that he was going to look for the girl Dazai told him about and that he would eventually let them know once he will find her; after that a some brief sentences, he simply went away.
Dazai never expected to be called by Atsushi and asked if he wanted to go with him for some commissions for the Agency. A simple look to Kunikida was enough for Dazai to get that he wasn't sure about this being a good idea but that probably the President himself told him to let them go. Dazai accepted, of course. Who would be so stupid to refuse the only chance to go out and try to look for a way to come back by himself? After all, Atsushi wasn't going to knock at the door of the Port Mafia, thus no issues at all right?
They have just finished buying a lot of candies that, with the few informations Dazai has, he's starting to think that they also house some lost children at the Agency. Atsushi looks way more relaxed now, despite Dazai's presence; well, if they have some kind of relationship, Dazai supposes this is normal to the other guy. The only difference should be the age.
«How old are you?» he asks, out of pure curiosity. Atsushi looks surprised by the question, but not annoyed by it.
«Eighteen.»
«Wow. Even older than me, now.»
«It doesn't really feel like that, Dazai-san... but you are different in some ways.» he admits, probably convinced that whatever he can say about how the adult Dazai is, it won't affect the Dazai in front of him. Or maybe he's just very naive.
«Am I? How?»
«You are... I don't know how to explain this. You have a bit of a different aura, I think.» he admits, opening one of the small bags at the same time and handing it out to him. It's full of those candies Atsushi just bought: «You want one, Dazai-san?»
«Mmh, maybe.» Dazai accepts, takes only one and unwraps it; he puts it in the mouth and savours it: lime.
They walk next to each other for a bit, silence between them. Dazai is mainly following Atsushi; he lets him lead the way so that he doesn't have to worry about checking the streets and can, instead, focus on the details. Who knows, he could see someone from the Port Mafia and make some kind of contact with them. It would be too much to be able to meet Odasaku by chance, but who knows.
«So, Ango said he is going to search for the girl I saw before losing consciousness. Orphanages, other childcare facilities in the area and in the streets.» he says, pretending to be casual about it «Did you ever notice her around here?»
«I don't. Also, I know only about a childcare facility and I hope the girl is not there.» Atsushi replies, more tensed now. This looks like nothing more than being uncomfortable about the subject at hand, to Dazai, but he can't suddenly be a good person and not ask only because of he noticed it. After all, it's not like he and Atsushi are friends: he has no obligations towards the guy.
«Were you in one on those?» he insists despite Atsushi biting his lower lip.
«I don't like to talk about it. It wasn't a good place, that's all.»
This is the first time Dazai hears him be so abrupt about something. He supposes that, in the end, every person has his own ghosts.
«Say, Atsushi-kun: do you know Odasaku?»
Atsushi looks at him, visibly more relaxed now that there's a different topic and slowly shakes his head «Not really. Is Odasaku a surname?»
«A nickname. His name is Oda Sakunosuke. He's a friend.» Dazai says - maybe this is the only absolute truth he's willing to share. And yet, this is also a lie. He still never mentioned it to Ango, let alone Odasaku, because both cases would be hilarious, but there is something similar to a break in the wall, when they are together and Dazai is starting to doubt it. He still would let Odasaku know his most important secret, and in front of the choice between living and dying, for Odasaku he would die. Probably. If there is not too much pain, he could. And of course, having to choose someone to watch his back, Odasaku would be the first and the only one - there is Chuuya, but Chuuya is the kind of "watch my back but then at the end of the fight I have to keep an eye on you and your kicks"; Odasaku, instead, is the "I don't need to ask you to do it, you would do it anyway".
«Odasaku would have taken you and raised you, if he had met you.» Dazai keeps talking «He has this habits of taking care of people, kids specifically. I don't know why he does it exactly, but I suppose the world needs someone like him for this stuff too.» and he shakes his shoulders a little bit.
Atsushi is listening carefully to his words, curious about such a man maybe, or trying to figure out if they met but he simply doesn't remember him.
«So he is your friend.» he repeats with a smile «Does he work with you?»
«If you mean to ask if he's in the Port Mafia too, yes. But it doesn't suit him.» he clarifies, immediately, a slightly annoyed tone. He does respect Odasaku and his life choices, but Dazai will never stop telling him that if he really wants to do such a job without killing people, he'll better change. Dazai is almost thinking about threaten him with a "I won't take your kids if you die on me, Odasaku" or something along the line.
«I don't think it suits you either, Dazai-san.»
«Because you have almost inexistent judgment skills. Seriously, you are not that different from the kid we have in the Port Mafia, yet you are total opposites in this.» Dazai almost whines about it, still walking next to Atsushi. He recognises the area, more or less, and he knows that they are going back to the Detective Agency office. Still, not a single familiar face around.
«But would you really have a friend if you were such a horrible person, Dazai-san?»
«A friend in the Port Mafia doesn't count. It's supposed to be two bad people cooperating.» he corrects him, already tired of trying to convince that guy about his nature; Dazai is used to people not being able to understand him, not that he dislikes it or makes him sad - frankly speaking, he couldn't care less. If anything, being able to pretend, to lie and to deceive to a certain level is way more useful than a bunch of friends.
«But I have to admit» he adds while they turn on the left and the Detective Agency building becomes easy to spot «that Odasaku is some kind of exception. He probably thinks that I am not beyond hope and that, somewhere, I still can be a decent person. Very wrong impression, if you ask me.»
Atsushi, next to him, chuckles a little; it could be unheard if not for the fact that Dazai is used to catch even a tiny glimpse of everything.
«What is it?»
«You are more talkative than usual, in a way.»
Dazai smiles, and maybe on the outside they could even seem close friends of the same age: «That's because I'll be gone soon, Atsushi-kun.» he says «So it doesn't really matter if you listen to me or ignore me, if you will remember us talking like this or not. And I'm not exactly telling you secrets: that much, I'm sure my future self would never do it.»
Atsushi looks at him, but there is such a mix of expressions on his face and so many feeling in his eyes that Dazai chooses to not make eye contact with him this once.
«Anyway, I think you should search for Odasaku once I'm back. Or ask my future self to introduce you. Maybe he will adopt you.» he jokes - well, there is still a chance anyway.
Atsushi seems to accept the change of topic once again, even if less happily than before; he opens the door and lets Dazai enter first, if to check on him or out of kindness, Dazai is still not sure, and then closes the door behind himself. There is a staircase to reach the office where they were before, the dim light still enough to don't miss a step while going upstairs. Dazai just put his foot on the first one when Atsushi's voice reaches him and makes him turn towards him.
«Dazai-san, maybe I'm wrong» he begins, his features relaxed and a small smile on his lips «but I hope I will be able to meet Odasaku-san. He sounds like someone you love very...» he stops, the end of the sentences dies on his lips or maybe caught in his throat. Dazai has no time to ask him if everything okay because those words stirred something up inside him and so he begins to move, step by step, towards the office.
If only he turned again, he would see on Atsushi's face the realisation about who Oda Sakunosuke really is, and if he insisted enough after noticing, in the end he would probably discover that the reason for the change in Atsushi's expression is because of similar words the boy said to an older Dazai, close to a grave - but Dazai bits his lower lips and ignores Atsushi behind him, all the more when he hears his steps following him.
What does it mean that Odasaku is someone he loves?
«Dazai!»
Kunikida's voice is not what he expected as a welcome the moment he enters the door. Yet, what surprises him a little - and give him and headache, to be honest - is the Edogawa guy next to Kunikida's desk, looking at him.
He has a satisfied face while he eats some kind of sweet Dazai doesn't recognise, but the satisfaction clearly has nothing to do with the food.
«I found her.» he says, like it's nothing major to find not only the whereabouts of an unknown girl without a single distinguishing mark to make her easy to track down, but to also find her: «After all» Edogawa keeps saying «that's exactly what my ability is made for.»
*
Edogawa really found her but Dazai doesn’t get why even Ango has come like this is some sort of a farewell party. True, from what Yosano told him during the check-up she did before letting him go, he lost consciousness for three days before waking up - which is probably why all those people who somehow know him were so frantic about him - but really, is this necessary?
The girl, as he expected, is older than he thought; unlike her other self in Dazai’s timeline, she looks calm and composed, and apparently she isn’t even surprised to know that she is the one who sent him here with her ability. Ango is next to her the whole time, maybe to escort her later.
«Seems like she sent the adult Dazai in the past» Kunikida tells him, two fingers massaging his temple «so you basically switched places. At least you didn’t disappear in your timeline, so once you go back everything should be okay.» he explains briefly, the girl nodding a few steps behind him. Dazai would like to ask her a lot of questions, but it’s hard to do when everyone seems to be anxious of sending him back; not that he wants to stay, anyway.
She closes the distance between them, stops two or three feets from him. She has to look up in order to properly make eye contact with him and Dazai lets her do it - it could be necessary to send him back. He thinks he remembers about looking at her younger self face, at some point.
«You should stop the me in the past.» she says, a quiet but determined voice.
«I don’t think I want to mess with you a second time.» and it’s better if the Port Mafia doesn’t get her but maybe it would be better if she ended up with them than with someone else. There is no need to tell her, though.
«Nothing good comes from seeing the future or the past when you are not supposed to be able to change them.» she says, dead serious - too serious for a child.
«Dazai-san!» Atsushi’s voice surprises him and for a split second Dazai thinks about ignoring him, but that would mean too many things he doesn’t want to focus about right now.
«What is it? You already miss me, Atsushi-kun?» he means this as a joke, but Atsushi takes his hands into his own and why are they all so serious, really?
«Thank you, Dazai-san.» thank you for what? «And you should tell him.»
«Tell what? To whom?»
Atsushi closes the distance a bit more, in order to not be heard if not by the girl maybe. Dazai shakes his head, hearing his words, and interrupts the contact between them - physically and visually.
When he looks back at the girl, he feels his consciousness slowly slip away.
Tell Odasaku-san that he’s your precious friend at least once, Dazai-san!
