Stronger for you (week 3, m3)

[hakurenshi]

 

Prompt: //
Missione: M3 (week 3)
Parole: 1651 (370 + 478 + 803)
Rating: gen
Warnings: possibile OOC, missing moment

The night is quite calm, all considered. Outside the weather is cold, both because of the season they are in and the late hour. Eichi knows that if someone were to notice the light on in one of the practice rooms, he would almost certainly be scolded. Luckily enough for him, there aren't many people around so late at night— or better said, he knows that there are other idols who want to practice to their hearts' content, but as if they have a silent agreement, they always manage to use rooms quite far one from the other and never really bother each other.

Thankfully, the air conditioning works perfectly, so he doesn't have to worry about the temperature at all. The room is spacious, a big mirror occupying the whole wall in front of the entrance. Music lingers in the air, the last notes of a song he knows by heart as much as the dance moves necessary for a perfect performance. The mere fact that he's doing good, though, doesn't make him feel satisfied. He fought an enormous amount of people and situations to reach the point of perfection so that every single person in the audience could feel happy to have watched what was going on during a concert or whatever business decided to hire him and his unit. After trying so hard, in his own way, he would never make the mistake of feeling too arrogant about his preparations.

So he tries, again and again. The song finishes, he stops to catch some breath and then moves on. He looks at his reflection in the mirror, adjusts whatever seems wrong or poorly done in his posture or in the way he stops a particular movement, then he tries to remember his own corrections. It would be easier with someone watching him and pointing out for him what he can't catch himself, but he willingly chose to practice by himself. He knows that people around him will always be worried for him to some extent— well, at least the few he allowed to see his worst and his weakest side.

He doesn't need kindness and worries, right now. He needs perfection.

*

Of course, his plans can’t just go smoothly if Keito is somehow involved. It's not that much surprising, to have the other reach him and judge him with a simple look. Eichi doesn't need to ask him why the long face: he knows that even if he respects how hard Eichi works, Keito can't completely approve of his lack of self-preservation. When this happens, it's better to have silence between them, at least in the beginning.

Music comes to a stop, silence filling the room once again if not for Eichi's slightly hard breath. The song per se it's not too hard nor too lively in terms of dancing moves; the subject, after all, is far from the style of some other units, based on a specific concept and peculiar music. The overall feeling they are expected to convey is a joyous one, but still, after more than one hour of practice with almost no breaks, it's starting to be a bit hard for him. Fortunately, Keito seems to have come prepared— Eichi wouldn't expect less from him. So when the other guy offers him a bottle of water, Eichi gives him a grateful smile and gladly accepts the drink.

"You don't need to overexert yourself like this," Keito immediately scolds him, even though it's easy to hear the concerned note in his voice, "we already had plenty of practice in the afternoon and considering that Tsukinaga was included for most of it, it went surprisingly..." he stops, adjusting his glasses. Eichi can't help but muffle a small chuckle. Keito looks more tired whenever people like Leo are around, so it's not hard to guess that he must be feeling conflicted about complimenting him.

Keito lets out a small cough, his hand covering his mouth before he adds a very diplomatic "you could say it wasn't that bad."

Eichi decides to let this slide without making fun of him— he does it, sometimes, hoping that Keito notices that his way of doing it is that of a person who is fond of the other. Sometimes Eichi can't help but think that if it took them so long to be honest with each other until the end, it wouldn't be so strange to find out that Keito hasn't completely grasped the situation between them.

"Really," Keito's voice catches his attention, "you should relax a little or take more breaks if you can't stop practising at this unholy hour."

Eichi takes a sip of water, feeling refreshed enough. He still wants to review everything a couple of times, but he can compromise. Just this once, maybe. It is late, after all.

"I promise, Keito," to relax, to wrap it up soon, "but won't you practice with me at least once?"

*

Music is flowing and it's amazing how this simple, little thing can make him feel so at peace. Singing, dancing, conveying feelings to those who are listening to him is the incredible magic of being an idol. Eichi doesn't think he will ever be able to give this up.

Keito is moving accordingly to this afternoon practice, polished movements he already had as Akatsuki's leader. It's not surprising if one considers the kind of accurate gestures their dance always required. Yet, if he has to be completely honest, Eichi feels like they can achieve so much more than this. For him, it's crystal clear when they manage to be like now, alone and in sync as easily as breathing should be.

It's a bit funny to look at from an outsider's perspective since they are supposed to be a shuffle unit of five, and there are a lot of parts when nobody is singing because it's not their turn. Despite this, the harmonies are perfect and there are no issues with the dance; the atmosphere, too, is exactly what the song should convey. Feelings of not being able to easily tell the most important thing to the most important person, yet trying their best and firmly believing.

One of his favourite lines is coming— I want to grow stronger for you— and Eichi can't help but look at Keito, who has been his strength and has sacrificed himself more than he thinks he did, yet never asked for something back, nothing but being seen for who he was and what he was doing in the name of what they had and still have.

It might be friendship, for him. Loyalty. But Eichi thinks he's still quite good to get what others often can't see, both about the world and about themselves. That's why he wants to sing those words not only because of practice, right now, but because it's only the two of them and there will be no other chance to not be misunderstood. For Keito to not think that this is just a song, just some words, just pretending to feel what they sing because that's an idol job to some extent.

That's why Eichi stops. Keito does it too, there's no way he would ignore Eichi stopping in the middle of rehearsal.

"I want to grow stronger for you," he repeats and he knows, the moment Keito's eyes focus on him, that they are both aware this is not about lyrics anymore. Eichi can see everything clearly— Keito realising it, his expression going from confused, to shocked, to confused again. Then, the slightest sign of embarrassment.

And Eichi moves closer until they are one in front of the other, nothing more than inches between them. He would never go into Keito's personal space if he could see even the tiniest sign of him being uncomfortable, but there's nothing like that in the way Keito frowns and shows a small pout Eichi hasn't seen in ages. It makes him smile, a tender feeling filling his heart. So he reaches out with his hand.

Keito holds it before actually realising he's doing it, a reflex that makes Eichi happy. There's something incredibly comforting in the way Keito is, for him, the person who will always hold his hand no matter what or how cruel he might be towards someone. To Keito, who never left his side even when Eichi thought he did, or when he pushed him away (consciously or not), Eichi wants to be his honest self and no one else.

"Keito?" he calls his name because he wants to look at him while he tells him. When Keito finally concedes eye contact, Eichi gives him a smile, the softest he can manage without feeling too much of an idiot, "I am in love with you."

It's like a matter of fact. Something they should have shared earlier, but never did. From Keito's reaction, Eichi can imagine that he had found out or at least considered the option once already. And that couldn't make him happier. He holds Keito's hand back, properly intertwining their fingers together, just before Keito slightly moves. Eichi mirrors him, giving him a small kiss on the lips. It's not like he wouldn't dare to do more, but not here and not now— this moment is what they deserve right now, what they work so hard to achieve, something that would have been inconceivable just one year ago.

For tonight, going back to the dormitory together will be enough.

They grew stronger for each other, or at least they have started to. They just have to keep going, now.